Why a home workout?

Why am I so hooked on working out at home? Because it works for me. I know it's not everyone's bag and that's ok. I used to be a gym person - I LOVED my Healthworks. I was someone who loved having so many options for classes and while I know this isn't the case for everyone, I'm the kind of person who once I could get over the hump of getting to the gym, once I was there, I was in it. I was inspired by just being in a space with other motivated, fit people.

Fast forward a few years later to kids and my gym experience turned into 3 kids plastered to the glass wall of the child watch staring me down, counting the seconds until I would come pick them up. Working out lost something for me in that environment. Instead of losing myself in my workout, I was anxious, waiting for that moment when I'd get called out mid-class to deal with the diaper explosion or the kid who wouldn't stop crying. Over time, not only did I stop enjoying my workouts but it was no longer giving me what I wanted and needed. I was unfocused, my workouts weren't nearly as effective as I wanted or needed to get my body back to where I wanted it to be, and I was spending money we didn't really have for this experience. So I stopped going. I spent another few months paying for the gym membership I wasn't using, wishing I could figure it all out and get back there because I knew I wanted to get in shape again. My clothes didn't fit the way I wanted to, my self-esteem was in the crapper and I was frustrated and disappointed in myself for not being able to make it work for me. And the thing is, it wasn't working for me and that was the problem. 

Exercise and being healthy is hard work, no two ways about it. And when you're busy and stressed, that's time and energy that you often just don't feel like you have to spend. As a mom of three young kids, I didn't have the energy or the emotional or physical bandwidth to keep fighting that fight every day, every workout. It was hard enough to lace up my sneakers to go (and that was true BEFORE kids) but to begin that daily fight by hauling 3 unwilling, under-enthused little people in with me, only to know that they'd whine, cry and be miserable the whole time I slogged through my workout was enough to keep me at home. Add to that the fact that as a family with 3 kids in daycare, we definitely didn't have the money to pay for a monthly gym membership and the associated child-watch fees, especially when I wasn't using it regularly! So I stopped. I quit. And I continued to feel crummy about myself.

The reality was that I wanted to figure it out but the model that had always worked for me pre-kids, was a model that no longer worked so for a while I gave up on trying. Until a friend suggested I check out a home workout program. She suggested P90X which when I checked it out, scared the living crap out of me. WAY TOO intense for someone who'd been out of the game for a while but I did stumble on another option that scared me just the right amount. I mean if you're going to make a change in your life, it needs to be a little scary, right? That's how you know it's a change you want and that's worth fighting for. So I bit the bullet, ordered and for the next 60 days, got up every day, got the kids settled with their breakfast and morning cartoons and I trudged down to my basement and pushed play. It wasn't always pretty. Many days I'm sure it was quite ugly in fact as my out of shape, post-baby self worked up a sweat with Shaun T. but I did it. Every day. And what I learned in that 90 days was this:

• I could still do it. I may not have been fit like my former rower self but that was ok. 3 kids and age meant I was starting in a different place than I once was and that's ok. I may have started out with a baby belly, no stamina and muscles that had forgotten and quickly reminded me what a good workout felt like, but I ended that 60 days stronger, more fit and determined to keep going. They say it takes 21 days to form a habit and for me, 60 days in, I'd developed a habit that I liked and that had me excited to see what I could do with another 60 days.

• Much as I never thought I'd like pushing play on a home workout program, it worked. It fit with where I was at in my life at that time. My kids could do their thing at home while I worked out. Some days that meant an extra 30 minutes of cartoons, but I'll take it for a little more mental health on my part and I know I'm a better and more patient mom on those days when I get my workout in. I wasn't stressed out the entire time. Yes, a lot of days my workout was interrupted so I could grab someone a juice or wipe away some tears, but I was also able to give more in those on moments than I ever was at the gym with the kids in child-watch. Sometimes I need to clear my workout space of the toys, but it's still do-able and that's what counts.

• I needed a plan, not just a one off. I'd bought a handful of Jillian Michaels dvds in my post-college years and tried them out here and there but they alone weren't enough for me. I'd get bored doing the same 3 workouts over and over so I'd start and stop and never really get into a good rhythm. Buying a 60 day program where every day I could get up, know what workout was planned for me, and check it off in a box gave me direction, focus, and the sense of accomplishment and progress I needed. It also took the guess work out of things because I'm no trainer or nutritionist. I was totally just stabbing in the dark when I was "eating healthy" or getting back into shape with those make-shift workouts and the occasional run. There's something to be said for buying a 30-60 day program where certified fitness experts have crafted a program that hits on different muscle groups each day, where they've planned out your rest days for you, and where the nutrition plan is designed specifically to support the workout you're doing.

So here I am, 3 years later. 
Still working out at home. 
Still content with this set up. 

My kids are a little older, more self-sufficient and equally apt to interrupt me if I'm working out during their waking hours. The difference is they now know that mom works out daily. They know that my workout time is something that is a priority for me and they don't question it. Instead, they often choose to workout with me or hangout and talk to me while I workout. Do my kids still interrupt me? All the time! Hayden hung out with me this morning, Parker and Addie did yesterday and I welcome it. 

Instead of them resenting me for the time they have to spend in the child-watch or ducking out the door to hit the gym before they're up and missing seeing their faces in the morning before work/school, I get my workout in at home, hang out with them for a bit and still get out the door to work on time. Yes, I do also get the critiques from them, "mom, I can go lower in my squat than you," a laugh at my ridiculous attempt to do yoga, or they show me up on the pull-up bar (every time!) but what I love is that they're happy, I'm happy and I'm able to be there setting a good example of what it means to be happy and healthy for them. It's not a chore like dragging my sad, reluctant self to the gym once was. Instead it's something I want to do and that they'll now encourage me to go do if they know I've skipped my morning workout.

It may not be everyone's reality or ideal, but it works for me. And that's what is what it's all about - finding something that DOES work for you and making it happen.